Day 35: Unbearable Pain Meets Relentless Love
She only ever called to ask the same questions. It didn’t matter that I no longer lived in the same country; my grandmother always peppered me with questions asking about my grades. This was the closest she came to saying, “I love you.” She couldn’t hug or kiss me across the phone, but she could push me towards success. She emigrated from rural Spain and the best measure of her love was persistently pushing me towards success. It never mattered where I moved or wandered, she was home. As a kid, my family moved frequently, making any sense of consistency hard. It didn’t matter; she was always home.
When I received the call that she died, I had just started my second semester at NU. In my dorm room, grief descended into the air like a slow, thick fog sticking to every surface. Words were caught in my throat and I couldn’t push past the fog that surrounded me. Perhaps, grief’s cruelest trick is that it settled in my mind and memory shaking loose when it pleased.
But—thank God. Thank God that when I am stuck in silence he never ceases being my advocate. Simply, I don’t have the strength or ability to endure. But, Christ does.
In a season of what I thought was unbearable pain, Christ invited me to live in an unshakeable kingdom—pain, grief, hostility, and even death cannot separate me from him because of his great sacrifice for all. His love knows no bounds, exceeding my limitations and imagination. It is in this King of creation that I found my life, surrendering to the one who embodies what it truly means to be alive. Pain doesn’t disappear, but, Christ’s love compels him to advocate for those who are lost in silence.
Read Hebrews 2
During times of uncertainty, God’s kingdom never changes. As high priest and advocate, he sacrificed himself in order to give the best gift: him. Go over the story of salvation, and remember. He will never be shaken.
So, friend, unfortunately, a time will come when pain becomes more than an acquaintance. It is my fervent prayer that you will not be stuck in silence. Instead, you’ll take a chance on the people that love you best. Even the saints did not journey alone.
Question to Consider:
Perhaps, this is the most important question: will you let God advocate on your behalf?
Prayer
God, help me to praise you in times of joy and in times of pain. Help me to run to you when I am weak.
By Liz Mena